The Sweetest Thing. But no Sympathy

I need to start by saying that my relationship with my wife is the most precious thing here on Earth to me.  We finish each other’s sentences, we enjoy doing all the same things.  Words can’t describe how good we get along.  Do we argue?  Rarely.  It’s usually about me being stupid.

Just so that’s out there…

There’s something that I just don’t understand in my marriage.  There is an unwritten rule that I’m not allowed to get injured or sick.

Injuring my shoulder last week brought this issue up again.  My wife was out of town with the kids for a wedding and I went for a mountain bike ride.  So as I sat waiting at the urgent care, I remembered that my wife still didn’t know anything, and I didn’t want to call her.  The knowledge that she would be mad, not upset, but mad at me for putting myself in harm’s way, made me want to text her rather than call.  Here’s our text conversation:

Me:  Well, I’m sitting waiting at an urgent care.  I went over my handlebars this morning and landed on my shoulder.  It’s not killing me.  I just can’t move it much.  My guess is either a bad bruise, minor dislocation or broken collar bone.

My wife:  Nice! (note the exclamation)

“Nice”  has been used by my wife like other people use unmentionable four-letter words.  Adding the exclamation meant she was mad… at me.  Getting all this from her short text comes from living with her for twenty-one years.

I can’t get a cold or flu or anything in our house.  I’ve gained a great reputation with people for perfect attendance over two decades of both corporate and ministry work.  There’s no way I’m takin’ a sick day to stay at home.  The misery of head congestion, a cough and not getting along with my wife…    ugh,  just shoot me.

She’s got good reasons for reacting this way.  I’ve just never been able to figure out what they are.

When the kids get sick or hurt, Supermom takes over.  Medications, special foods and extra-special treatment are lavishly poured out on our kids.   In fact, I’m surprised they don’t get sick more often to take advantage of mom’s great treatment.  I would.

For me, it’s zero sympathy.

When U2 came out with Sweetest Thing in the late 80’s, they captured my relationship with my wife perfectly.

My love, she drops me like a rubber ball

Oh O Oh, the sweetest thing

In the end, I wouldn’t change a thing.



  1. Sorry, out sick today. « David Kush's Blog - November 3, 2010

    […] wouldn’t ya know it, as soon as my wife posted her response to my  No Sympathy blog, I get a head cold.  Yes, and my shoulder is still killing […]

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